Inspiration is all around (you just have to look)

I’ve recently been writing about mentoring and it’s made me really think about who in my life I’d consider to be a mentor and also who’s had an influence on me without me necessarily noticing at the time.

If you’d asked me about whether I had a mentor (let alone mentors) a couple of years ago I probably would have laughed. But now that I’ve really considered what a mentor is, I’ve realised that there are a couple of people in my life who are informal mentors to me now, and there have been others in the past too.

Firstly, I think I should probably explain how I’d define the kind of mentor I’ve been lucky enough to have. I’m not talking about a formal mentoring arrangement, more a personal relationship that inspires me.   

And that’s what I think is so wonderful about what I’ve come to realise - there are people all around us who inspire us in one way or another, but if you don’t know to look for them you don’t realise what they’re giving you.

When I was writing about mentoring for a client, it was more focused on a structured mentoring relationship, but the way in which mentors inspire and help you up your game made me realise that I have people like that in my life, they’re just not necessarily involved with me from a professional perspective.

My mentors

I have a fantastic friend who I teach SUP with. She’s an inspiring woman at the best of times, but she has definitely been a positive influence on me, and has been nothing other than supportive since I first told her I was considering leaving a full-time job and going freelance.

We’ve had a few conversations about work while we’ve been out on the water - incidentally, it’s a great environment for a mentoring session. I think if I ever become a mentor to anyone I’m going to suggest we meet on the water. Anyway, I’ve never asked her to be my mentor, but she’s definitely inspired and encouraged me. She’s challenged me to be better and taught me to trust in my abilities.

Then I started to think about other people who have had a positive influence on me, and who I’d also consider to be something of a mentor.

I had a particular friend at university who is probably the person I’d consider to be my first mentor. Her name was Bengu (Ben). She was incredible. She was so motivated, so driven and eternally kind. Sadly she passed away a few years ago. I still miss her.

There were many amazing things about her, but one of the things that stuck out for me was that she didn’t just want to succeed herself, she wanted to help others succeed as well. She pushed me to do so many things while I was at university that I’d never have tried myself - she dragged me out of my comfort zone, at times kicking and screaming, but she was always right, I enjoyed it in the end and it made me better at what I did (journalism at that point in my life).

Even after we left university, she never stopped challenging me. Whenever we spoke on the phone or met for a coffee (far too infrequently really), she’d ask what I was doing and then make suggestions about other things I could try. She could sense when I wasn’t quite happy with where I was at and would always give me a nudge in the right direction.

And to me, that’s what a mentor is all about. Formal or informal, deliberate or accidental, it doesn’t matter. There are people in our lives who inspire and encourage us. We don’t always realise they’re doing it until we stop and take notice, but they are - and they’re so important. Personally and professionally they make you better. I only hope I can have that effect on someone one day.

Ben and I the day we graduated